"Mammm mlmm said the bulls*** word again!"

I can not believe this crazy weather we are having. I has gone form hot to cold to hot to now freezing and it looks like winter not even fall! i am freezing to my core and I can not believe it. I know that they say fat people are always warm but not this fatty I am chilled! Or as we say in this house Burrrr Freezing! Do to the lack of sun today I woke up and could have slept in. The kids didn't get up until 8 and I was up like always before them and I just waited for them to get up! I posted the rest of my blogs and hung around the house it was totally serene. Almost like a movie! Then up they popped like little rabbits coming out of there holes crying and complaining right from the get go! I can not believe how I am raising little whinny brats! I think they need to learn the value of quiet. (my friend suggested I need to buy some duck tape wonder what CPS would say about that?)

As soon as mo woke up I new this was going to be a fight to the end with him he was in a smart and mouthy mood and i think that when he is like this I wish I could lock myself in the bathroom until the sweet mo returns. But I just chugged along and got the dreaded schooling started! I thought that without mod home we could whip it out and then maybe do something fun seeing how SIL was coming today but NOOOO! He was going to push my very last nerve until I popped!( or blew steam out my ears!)

Got a surprising phone call that made my day and I realized that I just might have a new friend down here in crazy Acton! Yeah for me a friend! Even SIL said "I better watch out you are making friends!" She is way to funny! Well Sil got here and mo still sat doing nothing but complaining about his schooling he even begged me to send him back to regular school but I said I would do this for one year and I am going to stick it out! I know that I have been writing alot about the dreaded schooling but I did find some positives! Are you ready! I can take the kids to the doctors and dentist first thing in the morning and I can let them sleep in when I need alone time! How many of you can say that!!!

So with all the drama from mo and schooling mlh came in and he had this look of disgust on his face and i just have to share this story with all of you are you ready... He came down the hall and right before making the face he said "Mammm mlmm said the bulls*#! word again!" I know that some of you will not think this is funny but I couldn't help but get a little tickled. First let me start by saying he was disgusted because he knows its a bad word! Second I did explain to him something that I was taught when I was younger (you can tell me what they said or did and you wont get in trouble as long as you do not say it or do it) which I think is a good thing...open communication! Then I told him that only big people can say that and then he said another funny "oh like you SIL!" So yes mommy can't say it but SIL can!

After talking to my 4 year old about using that word I was off to talking to mlmm and forget it! That girl is a trash talking angry 3 year old her answer to the whole thing was "OH OK I QUIT!" This is what the man says at least once a day and now mlmm is saying it! So not I'm sorry but I quit! I have to look at this in a different light and this is my thought on this maybe if she keeps saying I quit to everything she will be able to surrender to God easier? Just a thought!

So went to home depot with sil and was going to do a little shopping after but with the man at home with the three of them and all the phone calls i decided that this is a joke and went to taco bell and then home. I forgot how much i love that place!

well to my newest reader and to my new friend! I thought about it and yes I do care maybe to much and maybe that is why I blog! So I can see the patterns in my life of where i let people use me. I am not saying that I have it down yet but I am getting better! Also, this roller coaster is getting old and I am ready to try a new one so I am hoping to learn this lesson soon so I can get off! Just a thought!

By the way once the man got home mo finally did his work and got it done in 2 hours! AHHH that kid is going to send me to my grave!

You can leave but you better leave your check!

Well I drove my cheerleader home and that spent an hour talking to her mom and I for the first time since moving here feel like I found some one who is honest with me and I liked it. Weather or not that is really the case I will only know on Tuesday! But for tonight I will live in the moment that it was real! Got home only for the man to yell at me and for me to finally realize that when the Steelers are loosing I need to stay away longer. I came home in the last quarter and that was a big mistake! Finished watching the game and then it was time to watch another game. So I sat down with mod and started her school work that we didn't get done on Friday!

Mod had a melt down and told the man and me that she hates it here and that she misses Bakersfield! I agreed with her and I do not think this made the man happy! I know that she misses R her best friend and I miss The suburbs and the idea of maybe going back to work one day! I miss Happy Go Latte! I miss church and I miss worship! Mod agreed with me and know I have someone on my side and I love it! I know that moving back is not ever going to happen and that it is time to move on but...

Mom and dad came over and brought the kids home and also brought milk which is a big blessing! they stayed for lunch and mom and I talked while dad counted stars on the couch. We ate burgers and they went home and took mod with them. I explained to mo that he should get some of his school work for tomorrow done today but that wasn't happening! For the rest of the day I got to sit and get the rest of my blogs done and a little FB time and now it is late again and I am up and not sleepy and contemplating my life!

The man asked me this week what I would do if he were to just leave! All I can say is that my answer was nice, sweet and to the point! You can leave but you better leave your check!

Girls Girls Girls!

There is something so magical about night games and I can not believe how much I love them.

Can you believe it is already October? Well I can not believe it! Got up this morning and I am such a crazy person and my husband really was not happy that I completely forgot that today was the car show. Thankfully his brother was not able to come down because I think that he would have killed me. I am also glad that we didn't put his car in the show that would have been a big mess. A big mess because of the time frame and a big mess because of the money. So the man went and got our veggies this morning and then informed me about the show and that is when I realized that I really messed up. Well he helped me with a couple of things and then took mlh,mo,and mod to see what kinds of cars where at the car show. What makes me really sad about the whole thing is that I think that the man could have really won. So because of me having a bad attitude I said some things that where very rude and I am really sad that I said them.

So the man came home and then we got the front of the house finished up this morning. you should have seen the pile of rocks that we finally got off of the driveway. I am so happy! Now we need to go and get rock and dirt and then we will be all ready for the rainy season. Hopefully we will have time to get everything ready so we will not get washed out this winter. Last winter was a mess! There was days when we really could do anything because of being all washed out.

After we got all done with all the rocks and every thing outside we came in and got the house all cleaned up and ready for tomorrow we are going to hide in the room while the man watches the Steeler game (haha! they are playing the Ravens!)After getting the house picked up the man came in and informed me that he needed to take a nap. I know that it is very necessary for every man to get his sleep but man I really need a nap I mean I really need a nap! So then he went into the bed room and I helped mo get his school work done. He has to play catch up from all the running around and then the no power form yesterday so we had the usual fight and then the man got up and yelled at the kids and that was the end of the nap for him. So mom called and thankfully and the man took the little ones to her house which was a great thing because I am not sure how they would have done tonight at a night game that ended at 10pm and then the hour drive home and man oh man. I am so thanful!

The man got home and then we drove and picked up one of the girls from the team and off we went to the game. I just want every one know that in the car my husband was totally cracking me up and i am so glad that he has a since of humor. It is so amazing how loud girls are. I mean really loud! We got to Simi Valley early and then we stopped off and got some dinner and then we went to the game. I can not believe how much I am really starting to hate living in a small town. I just wanted to enjoy football with the kids and get to have some friends up here and I wanted to meet some people that had kids and I guess that I will not be able to do the friend thing up here!

So the game was a bust we lost. Mo can not get into the game and really makes the man crazy and I am not sure If this will be happening next year. I think that the man really wants to have something in common with mo. I do not think it is going to be football. But he did get to cheer for some of the other kids on the team and i think he really like that. I just do not know what to do with all of this.

The girls did a great job they are really coming along. They are finally watching the game and it is really a good thing. I even loved seeing them laugh and have a good time. I will be sad when there will no longer be cheer. I love the other team moms ( the twins) they are so much fun! they do not judge me and they really just make me feel again. I will say that if they are not going to be joining next year I will have to really look into this cheer thing. I even had a good time teaching the girls about football. Hopefully next weekend we will have a even better time with it and be able to really get these cheers down. i know that they are not my girls but they really did a great job!

On the way home the girls were singing watermelon this is a secret thing that i used to do when i was younger and Super Chef spilled the beans to my daughter who told the other cheerleader and now my secret is out. So when I was younger and even now If I do not know the words to a song I just sing Watermelon. i works and even looks like you are singing the song when you are not. So this is what the girls did the entire way home singing loudly and even cheering. I mean they cheered to the game and cheered all the way home and then yelled watermelon. i just laughed and laughed but i think that i am really going to owe the man. I know that most moms are really quiet and want piece but since I like to sing i really liked listening to them just being girls. I am glad that mod has used this time and really started to get to know some of the good girls and make friends. i just hope that I can make it to the end with out screaming and opening my mouth. I know that I do not need to get involved with another non profit I do not have the time and I will not let my old self come out. I am not going to become Mrs fix it! I never works and even when they do my ideas it is always a big ordeal and I just want out of the drama. So th man hates how loud girls are and I am hoping that mo can really have a good time with the new friends that she has.

Although we lost the Cheerleaders were A W E SOME the girls were awesome!

Lighting, thunder, kids crying, no power, and a night football game.

Lighting, thunder, kids crying, no power, and a night football game. Wow is it really Friday already? I can not even believe it I mean I really can not believe how fast it seems like things have been moving along. I feel like all the weeks are just running together. I am so not even kidding you I feel like I just had our last kid and she is already three. Where did the time go.

Got out of the shower and my uncle showed up with the little ones... I guess mlmm wanted to come home and spent some time crying for me. Mlh informed me that he only came home because mlmm was a wine bag and wouldn't stop crying. Thankfully I was in the laundry room when he showed up with the kids and I was some what dressed not in my towel like I was seconds before he showed up. I really did miss the little ones and I am glad they came home but i do wish I would have gotten a phone call.

So after the kids got home that is when the craziness started in and I spent most of the morning fighting with the kids to get their school work done. I can not believe how much I really hate morning like this. Then the 20% chance of rain showed up and that is when I though this is going to be a long day... They are never going to get their stuff done. So the rain continued and then the thunder and lighting and that is when they went outside to never return. I must admit it was an amazing act of God. There is nothing like it! We saw what scared mlh almost to death I have never seen him so scared. there was no counting there was just lighting and thunder all at once it so so loud and then the pop and the smoke and then the crying. Mlmm came out screaming. Then as my smart kid said "Oh Yeah God answered my prayer!" No power means no internet so no school! I can not believe it! I wish I had caught it on film.

So with no internet and the kids freaking out we sat and watched the storm outside. Mlh cried until the man came home and it seemed like it took forever for him to get home. That 30 minutes seemed like hours with mlmm crying the whole time. It also didn't help that mo kept telling him to watch out! Seeing how we didn't have power mod didn't get her hair curled for the game tonight and although the man didn't want to go but I couldn't see him at home with both kids and no power.

Off to the high school game we went and all I can say is man oh man thankfully we had cash on us because first I was not told that we had to pay to get in so we paid for all of us. Then after we got in we were told that we were performing at half time for the varsity game! so we had to get there so early why? Then my other mom didn't know about the money thing also so I met her at the gate to give her the last of our money. On the way to the gate I was told that I should have made mo wear his jersey because if he were to be in uniform then he would have been free! What! I paid for mod and mo for no reason! Are you kidding me no refunds!!! The babies wanted food and the man wanted to go home the kids acted weird to me and I really wanted to just say come on people!!! The man remembered that I had put 10.00 in his wallet and gave it to mo for snacks for them. Then it was game time so we all sat down and then mod started in crying about being hungry and I just wanted at that moment to get in the car and go home!

Mod performed and then it was time to go home and I have never seen the man get into the car faster. All I can say is what a day!Oh Mo pulled his non loose tooth out so he could get money! My kids are crazy!

Hello this isn't housewives of the AV!

Got up this morning and drove to the dentist did I tell you how I hate the dentist? So on the way to the dentist I realized that even though mom took the babies she left me with Mr. Grouchy! So attitude all the way there and then it was time to get sick! Got into the dentist and THANK YOU GOD! I didn't have to get a root canal! I am not sure how that would have worked out with me having the kids. While sitting in the chair waiting for the dentist that is when mo started in with being his crazy self asking all these questions and then bumping the chair. I got the shot and started to cry and that is when I realized that I have never been able to do this with out medicine and that was not happening with the kids with me so I have to suck it up and after making them sit down and doing a lot of hang signals we finally got down and my mouth hurts and I really hate how my kids talk and disobey me.

Went to the store before going home and I was only going to spend 100 dollars and 400 dollars later I realized that I really need to find where we are getting the money for this! I mean the dentist and now food man oh man maybe I need to go back to work! Got home and school was a joke and then I realized that I just wanted to sit on the couch and sleep and I had school work to do! Days like this suck! Got the kids to practice and then my day continued to get worse!

I just want to know what am I supposed to do when people are so comfortable with me and they talk to me. I know I have a face that makes you just want to tell me all your deepest darkest secrets! So I don't tell what you say to me but why do you blow what I said to you so out of proportion that it isn't even close to what i said! What the heck are you kidding me! I have a blog and I have no secrets with my life so you think that making this a big deal is going to make you look good? Hello this isn't housewives of the AV! I am not doing anything I wouldn't want you to do for me and my children! Also I really do not need you to like me I like me just fine all by myself!

Tooth ache!

Woke up this morning and all I can say is I am so sorry to all my family and friends that I have made fun of before. My tooth hurts so bad and I can not believe it I do not think i have felt this pain before and it hurts. It hurts all the way from my tooth to my jaw to my ear and I wish I did not have the kids home so I could find a dentist to fix it today. But after calling a couple of dentists and no luck I will be going tomorrow. Seeing how I do not have tags on my car I will be taking a risk going but it will be so worth it.

I did not take the kids to music practice today no tags and I feel so bad. The only good thing that happened to day was I got the house picked up and the kids got done with little fuss from mo. Mod even got some of tomorrows work done so she can take it easy tomorrow. I love this about her. I think that if she had her way she would rush though this year. I do not think she realizes that she has to go to school for 10+ years. If i have my way she will complete college!

Mom called today and came buy and took the little ones home with her this is going to make tomorrow so much easier. So I will only be taking the older fist fighters to the dentist. I just hope mo can keep his hands to him self. I am thankful that mom came and got the mess makers I will help me out tonight also seeing how I am totally broken. I told the man today that I feel like I have had a stroke. I mean my entire right side is totally messed up. I have a tooth ache and my shoulder is still a mess which makes this blogging thing a total joke it hurts. I just hope that after tomorrow everything starts to get better. Well at least my tooth will feel better I hope.

The man got called back to work this evening I took the kids to practice this evening and I really will not tell the man this but I do love talking to all the moms and I love watching the girls cheer. They are going to cheer at the local High school Half time and It will be nice to go to a high school football game I do not think I have been since JR was playing for Foothill High School in Bakersfield and that was a long time ago. I love football games I love the lights and the band and the smell of the field and the cold and the hot chocolate and the cheering (yelling) and man was that a run on sentence. All I can say is I love Football games. (Oh I did go to a couple of games in Valencia when SG was coaching but that is not the same as when you are there to cheer on your family or friends. I can not wait until Friday.

So I am off to bed and I am glad that I am getting all of these blogs posted. Sorry I took so long!

No Tags! You got to be kidding me Right!

Well today has been a day a day of not feeling like a great person a day where I had a talk with the man in the bathroom and a day where I feel like screaming WHAT ELSE DO YOU GOT FOR ME!!! I completely failed at being a teacher and yelled at the kids. I fought with them it seems like all day then the man came home and explained to me that they have no record of me paying my tags but they cashed my check so I had to call the bank and order a copy of the check and now we wait until we get tags. I can not believe all of this is happening. I just feel like the past couple of weeks have been a mess. So I guess we will have to just sit and wait for our check so I can get my tags. While we wait I guess we will just have to not drive as much as we normally would.

With all that said I tried to talk to the man about how we are totally messing up our kids and I do not think we see eye to eye right now!

Im sorry I haven't been posting

I am so sorry that I haven't been posting all of these blogs and after the day that I have had maybe its because I haven't been posting. So I will be working on that this week and getting all posted. I stressed the man out today because they froze our internet account and slowed our speeds I called and it is going to cost us 40 (a total of $80) more dollars a month for internet and I expressed to the lady on the phone that that would pay for a months worth of milk! I got off the phone and the man came home and I let him know how my day was going ant I should have kept my mouth shut! He flipped out!

Didn't go to practice tonight the man let me stay home and I guess they gave the man crap about me not being there so I guess I will go tomorrow. I loved being home my shoulder hurts so bad today and it was nice to just sit and relax. I hope that things start to look up soon. I need to get out of this funk that I am in.

Mod finally lost her tooth today. She and mlh were jumping around and then I guess mlh did something and bumped mod and her tooth fell out she flipped out and started to cry and I just started laughing it was way to funny. That tooth has been loose for at least a month. So we had a letter to Loyd and then he left her a note. I believe that she asked him to wake her up. I guess according to mod mlh got woke up instead of her. Mlh was woken up by something and stood at the head of the bed and screamed get away from me until I came in to get him. I guess Loyd left her a note that said "Sorry I tried to wake you up but I woke your brother up instead and had to leave when I saw your mother." So mod didn't see the tooth fairy again and mlh got scared by something.

I love her innocence she reminds me!

I feel like I will never get to church!

I feel like I will never get to church! Today has been a day of disappointment! That is all I can say! At least the Steelers won!

Had to do school today to catch the kids up and I feel like a complete failure!

Even at home we get spanked!

Even at home we get spanked! I feel like mo is getting constantly worse with every game! I feel like we did this so he could get friends and that didn't happen and at this rate he will never have a friend! I also really hate how the kids are so wild at the games. Because mod performed at the half time for both games we had to be there for 5 hours in the heat and man was it hot. We had a couple of girls get sick and then we had crying and when they all cheered it was nice. Mod cheered with the older girls and it really makes her feel like she belongs. Then she cheered for our team and we lost one and then mod felt like puking and then started crying and I really feel for them. The little ones ran around and cried and I think they hate football days!

So all and all a crappy day! (the performance was good the girls looked great!)but other than that not so good! When we got home the man wet own the kids I got in the shower and we did very little. The man worked outside on the truck and I just did nothing of importance. Maybe tomorrow will be better! Trying for church!

Today was a horrible school day!

Well today was a horrible school day with mod crying for three hours about taking her state test and not knowing all the answers. She wants to get 100% all the time and she hates to fail! Then it was mo's turn and he is so smart! That is all I have to say! Then I cleaned the house a little bit and made a football run through and now I am to tired to blog about my horrible day! Football and cheer tomorrow!

Oh! We found the missing turtle that I forgot to blog about in the hall closet getting ready to hibernate in this cold weather. Mod filled the tank for her brother and filled it too high and I think it was sending a message to my messy kid! Mo will say he found it but we know how that happened! Mod and I found him! He was scratching on the wall! Well that's our day!

This blog is NOT about you!

I am not sure if being me is a good thing I am not sure where I am in my life all I know is this... Don't read my blog if its going to hurt your feelings! Don't read my blog if you are going to lie about it (it makes you look stupid seeing how anyone can read it)! Don't read my blog if you think I am trying to hurt you! this blog is NOT about you...its about me! This blog is how I see things in my life! This is how my day has gone and I feel like screaming from the roof tops!

I Now know why he goes by his self!

Today has been an awful day and then a wonderful night and all I can say is I know know why the man goes by his self. After a bad day it was so nice to go to practice and talk to adults and an listen to them and just have a quiet moment. This is something I have not been able to do since mlh was born. As I sit here tonight and type this and even if I never post this I really do miss my past life. Going to practice and having 2 hours alone made me really miss it.

I loved talking and laughing and listening and watching and I really really need direction. It was so wonderful and at the same time sad! I miss my church even with all that happened! I miss worship, I miss doing nails and I miss just me! I feel like I have given up and I am no longer me just a shell of who I used to be! I feel like a lost dog waiting and looking for an owner. Well that was my day! I guess I need to pray!

I am not sure if I am going to continue to post all of these blogs ...

So today we all went to practice and going with all the kids is totally stupid! I got to talk to the adults and I got a phone list and a cheer list. So I think it was a great thing that we all went. Unfortunately while talking to the adults I was not paying attention to the kids and that made the man crazy mad! So I do not know how long this is going to work with me going to practice but it was nice! I really liked getting to know some of the other moms and it made me feel like we were on the right track. I just hope that we can keep up with the fun.

I am not sure if I am going to continue to post all of these blogs I am just torn with where I am and I hope I get some directions soon. I also am not sure if is what happened this weekend that has made me a little sour or what but I am just not sure what to do!

As for school it is going I have good days bad days and just indescribable days. Days where I get a high from it and days where I just want to cry and know with this cheer stuff and the fact that mo is totally making the man crazy with his lack of interest as far as football and school everything just seems like a whirlwind! I just hope I get some direction!

Burned head and mascara in the eyes!

Well today has been a day full of memories and lessons. A day that made me look into my past. Today I had to get the kids all ready for team pictures. As funny as it was sad it made me wonder if all those curling iron burns and soap in the eyes really were on accident (well maybe not the soap but defiantly the burns I mean I probably moved or maybe my sisters got side tracked or maybe it was the hot curling iron?)

Well let me get to the story. While getting mod ready for the pictures (which included curling ringlets and a little mascara) she moved to get some water and I got her head and you would have thought that I did it on purpose. I just want everyone to know that I am not the mean sister... I am not the mean sister that laughed and said well stop moving. Well I did I started laughing and I said its your fault you moved. That is when all the memories started pouring in and I even caught my self laughing. This laughter only pissed mod off and that is when she wanted nothing to do with me. I mean she game me the I hate your guts looks and the flash backs continued to pour in.

I totally remember my sisters burning me with a curling iron and I remember giving them the same look I even remember saying the same thing and that is when I thought what if they didn't do it on purpose? I am the little sister who never felt like I fit in and know I am the mean sister (I know that I am the mom but that is what I feel like)

So to my sisters that burned my head and put soap in my eyes and also got my eyes with mascara.... I am so sorry I that I believed that you were out to get me! I really could have used you tonight for the support and also for the laugh. I want you to know that although we are not in each others lives I have so many memories of our summers together. Good, Bad and the UGLY! Having girls is so different and I can not believe that I am a mom to two girls that hopefully will end up with a couple of burns, pokes and soap in the eyes, and maybe even some ghost stories. I can not believe how much I miss you!

Go Steelers!...I should have gone to church!

So went to moms for breakfast and all I can say is I really wish I would have gone to church! Hanging out with hung over people not fun! So watched the game and then came home just in time for me to leave the mo and mlh with the man and head out the door with the girls! We went to walmart and ran into one of the other cheer moms from a different team and it was refreshing to know that I am not alone with my frustrations! When I left I felt like I wasn't alone! they took mod home with them and she got to practice with the captain of all the cheer teams and I am so thankful that they did this I think it renewed mod's heart and got her excited to go to practice this week! (she wanted to quit as of yesterday)

I know that this is a crazy thing but you would think that smaller towns have it better but they don't! I am not sure how I am going to fit in here.

That is my complete day in a small couple of sentences. Lesson learned for the day...I should have gone to church!

Football and Oktoberfest!

I can not believe how crazy today was! I mean really crazy! First we drove to Westlake for our first away game for football! We got there on time and it wasn't too long before I realized that this was going to be a hard and crazy time! No coach for the cheerleaders and although I have offered to help ( no one took me up on it!) I did not know that it was going to just be mod and 2 other girls with no leader or a cheer list! So here are the girls looking at me and the other moms and I would like to fill this entire blog up with my frustrations but that will not make it better.

So here is the short story...I guess there is no leader for our team of four but only three showed up because on girl did not have a ride. We did a good job for the most part (I am trying to positive). The other moms did not get a message or phone call either and I am really sad and disappointed at how everything is ran! (every girl cried at least once and they thought the other cheerleaders where trying to make them feel bad!)Besides all of that they cheered wrong only two times and that is a great for a 6,8, and 10 year old!

After the game we rushed to moms and joined all the drunk people at Oktoberfest! It was nice to see some of my family that I haven't seen in years. It was nice that my mom had so much for the kids to do. All in all it was a great party! I think that my parents had a great time! I was fun to sit with the sober people and make fun of the drunk people. Everyone left except for family and Super Chefs friends (KH I do consider you a friend and I am honored that you read my blog, also it was so nice to see and hang out with you!)and that is when the crazy stupid came out! The man jumped in the pool and started a water fight and the super chef jumped in and that is when the pool party started. I quickly realized that mom was upset with the man and after helping clean and doing dishes we got out of there.

The entire way home I was totally pissed off and I will leave it at that! Like the man says it better to be pissed off then pissed on! We got home and got the kids to bed and after a long discussion we will not be going to church tomorrow we will be going to breakfast at moms and watching the Titans and Steelers game! So that is how my day went and hopefully I will no longer be mad in the morning but I doubt it!

AGGHHHH!

I do not feel like blogging and I need to figure this out soon! This is all I am going to blog for today! Busy Busy day tomorrow Football game and Oktoberfest!

"Tag in the butt?"

This is what mlmm says every morning when trying to get her dressed. She comes to me and holds her clothes which are always the craziest combination of clothes. ( I think that style is a good thing but some times I totally wonder what she is thinking and if she is totally blind. so she comes to me and then says this saying every morning and today it made me think first I love being a mom and second this is how my day has gone! I can not believe how funny mlmm is and I think that if I just sit back and watch it will be all great! So "Tag in the butt?" that is how she says it.

I could look at this saying in a couple of ways... the way she means it the tag goes in the back? which can some time describe my life. I know at least 5 times a week I have to say to mo "hey your shirt is on backwards!" but not always do i feel like i have to check how my clothes are on or even if the tag is in the back! Alot of the time I just do not care!

Then there is the Ha I tagged you in the butt and I think that this is how i feel most of the time like I am a kicking post for all to come by and take a kick. Like i have a big sign on my Butt that says Kick me! I know that this is not a way to feel my some times when you are down you are down and you know the saying kicking a down when they are down well I am down and ready for the kicking!

But I guess I could look at it like my wonderful husband does and laugh when ever she says this because he is a stupid man and is thinking like a man. Maybe that is my problem I need to start thinking or lack there of like a man I don't know you decide! So i hope you have a great day and put the tag in the butt!

A little note nothing great happened today which is a good thing!

"See God gave us what we need!" and..."Well if I'm touching it then no one else can!"

Today's posts has has several titles so here is the first One step forward and two steps back at this rate I will be back in hell before Christmas. This morning I woke up in the worst mood and man all the way to the doctors office even though mlh was laughing in the back seat and it usually makes me smile at his high pitched squeal this morning it made me crazy and I wanted to pull the car over to the side of the road and get out. I mean get out and leave them. But seeing how that would land me in jail I continued to the doctors office.

We got to the lab for mo and i to get lab work done and that is when I realized that I am totally crazy and I need a nap. Everything they were doing was making me want to scream. We got our blood drawn and then walked next door for mo to get a look at and then a TB test and I think that doctors should talk to parents in front of there hypochondriacs because the rest of the day he kept telling me that it was spreading and getting big! While in the doctors office I kept thinking I need coffee and a break. Got done with the doctors right before they stopped serving breakfast at Micky D's and they convinced me that we should stop just to make them shut up I caved in. Then we rushed to practice and got there 10 minutes early.

While the kids where in practice I got a notice form my facebook to my email and found out some sad news and made a phone call and seeing how my friend is doing okay all I can say is I am praying for her. While on the phone my little ones disappeared into the music teachers house to get into his candy stash. ( thankfully it is almost Halloween time so I can replace all the candy they ate!) I watched mod and then she had her daily melt down saying stuff like Why cant I be talented like mo and all he does is listen and he can play...I try and can't do it...it got me thinking that this is so true in life and she is totally right. Mo doesn't even want it and has this amazing musical gift. While mod wants it so bad and practices and practices and can't land a job! She started by telling me that this will only make her stronger and fight for what she wants and blah blah blah! that is what she said right in front of her teacher. Thankfully he is really good and defused her by saying you are right Mod but you have many talents that your brother doesn't have and you just need to practice and I bet you could be better than him. Seeing how she is so competitive I bet she will try harder.

We got back in the car and that is when I totally lost it and decided to try some reverse physiology and I think it worked. I turned off the music and yelled at them just like they have been yelling at me all day. I even did it in the same voice. Maammmm so and so this and so and so did this then I said did you like me yelling at you and the all sat in complete silence and shook their heads. It either worked or they all thought the same thing and I will hear about this when I get older. Remember the day that mom lost it in the car and yelled at us? She is a complete freak!

When we got home I told them to get everything out of my car because I was taking mod to her audition and then went into the house. Thankfully the man was home doing paper work because mo's school stuff came in and I totally forgot! So i walked in and told the man that I was in a mood and laid down on the couch and buried my head. Got up and got the kids on the computer and got all of today's stuff ready. Mod did what she could before we had to leave and I got mo all mapped out and then I got mod ready took the car seat out just in case and we left. Mod left something in the house and ran back in slipped on the wet floor and came back screaming and yelling that dad didn't care about her and I tried to comfort her by saying you have lines to memorize. So we went over lines and started on the way. We even got a scare because a cop came up on me and did the flash thing while i was in the carpool lane. Luckily it wasn't for me!

We got to her audition right on time and then did the wait thing. While we were waiting mod started sizing up her competition and said all sad I am way too tall for this part and they all look like they are 5. She was right! I think she is going to be tall! What can I say model! So they called her in and before she went in she prayed this sad prayer and then before I knew it we were on the way back to the car and on our way home. Before I got in the car the man called and said do you have mo's pads and helmet? Yes I do! So then he said are you in the car yet? No we are getting in right now. Then mod said lets pray so she prayed and then I did and we were on the road. The traffic was LA traffic and man oh man it was so amazing. I got a call and the man said do you think that you will be able to get there before 6 and I said it didn't look like it but that I would try. Well we got almost back home and mod said all so proud "see God gave us what we need!" Not what we wanted or needed or desired but what we need in current time! She is so right and it totally changed my day! totally! I guess I am not taking as many steps back as I thought.

While getting the kids bathed mlh said something so funny that I just have to share... He was doing the little boy thing and I said mlh do not do that in front of your sister. He then informed me that only he can touch it. This is what I have been saying since they were little. So then I said well you can do that in your room. "I can do it in my bed?" Sure I said then I said why in your bed? "Well if I'm touching it then no one else can!" the thoughts that little 4 year old think of cracks me up. When telling the man this story he informed me that mlh I guess thought that when he had his surgery that they cut it off! He even used the shwushhhh sound and used had movements. So the man had a discussion about parts tonight right before my conversation! I'm telling you BOYS!

Well I have great news!

Well I have great news! Mod only cried the last 20 minutes of school today and we even got done with all the subjects! Mo even got done and i feel like we are on the up! I think that is was a much needed break since I was up until 1:30 last night cleaning and getting ready for today and all that seemed to pay off. I am getting excited about the rest of the week. They also kept mod in both math classes so I guess she will be done with math in February. HA!

Today a funny thing happened and I think that it was so funny I have to tell you about it. Mo was going out the sliding glass door and mlh came behind him and pushed him out the screen. All I heard was a loud crash and then mo started crying and then mlh kept saying I'm sorry mo. I came to the rescue of the crying kid and the sight was so funny. He flew down both stairs and then on top of the mess that was outside and the screen was completely broken. Mo kept telling me that his foot was broken (its not) and I think that if I would have been smart I would have taken a picture.

So the man came home and man was he in a crappy mode. Then he saw the screen and I can not believe that he is so grumpy. He even told me that he was going to not take the kids to practice. Because I am not going to be threaten I went and got the kids already and before I knew it he was leaving without Mod. So here is mod running out the door and then out the gate screaming and crying and I started looking for my phone and then he came back down the road and then started in... So he dropped off the kids and came home and then left again to get them from practice and he never really got out of the funk he was in.

After getting all the kids already for bed and asleep the man informed me that he is no longer going to have his back hurt and he is sleeping in the office. My only response to this is I'm sorry our bed sucks! We can't even buy food this week and mo needs to get his blood work done tomorrow. Oh we also owe 5,000 dollars to medical that we do not have. Maybe in two years we will be able to afford a new bed. So I got the kids out of our room only for me to sleep alone! so that totally sucks!

So blood work, music lessons, mod has an audition and we still have to find room for school tomorrow! Did I mention that we live 30 minutes from any big town. So 30 minutes to blood 30 minutes back. 30 minutes in the opposite direction and the an hour and a half lesson and then 30 minutes back home just in time to get in the car and drive an hour plus depending on traffic to mod's audition. Crazy day tomorrow!

"You're driving me crazy!"

"You're driving me crazy!!" This is what mlmm said to me this morning in a very unpleasant way right after I told her that she could not have ice cream for breakfast. She shook her fists and gave me the evil eye and that is when I should have realized that today was going to be one of those days. (did I mention that she looked just like my mom when she said it! way too funny!)

I got up and got the kids up and mod started off great and then the melt down happened. Mo started late because he didn't have his classes up yet and then he had his first live lesson. So by the time his classes where up mod was already in her I cant do this mods and wanted to go back to bed! I finally got all of her supplies today and you should see all that awesome things we got today (mod wasn't impressed). I got to talk to mo's teacher and she is lovely and mo is going to be in 6th grade math which I think is awesome. I also found out that mod has been doing two times the work because of a computer glitch at her rate she was going to be done with school in February. They fixed it and I think that tomorrow will be better for her and for me.

I got done with school late today and made dinner for everyone and I have decided that I now have a full time job (homeschooling) and if you are related to me you can no longer come to my house. I totally gave up trying to clean up after the little ones and man I am not sure about the house. It looks like it did when we had only two kids and i worked 12 hours a day at the salon. I spent 2 hours tonight after everyone was asleep putting away things and cleaning. I just wish I could have done some laundry. But you can not dry clothes at night. The man came home tonight ate dinner and watched football. I do not think we said but a couple of words tonight. He also reamed me about not getting mo's blood work done. I just want to say well! and throw up my hands!

I did find something great about home schooling, are you ready for it? I do not have to spend hours and hours fighting with my kids about homework and questioning why the teacher taught my kids the old way to do things! Well off to bed finally!

30 days! What how can that be!

Well its officially football time in our house. On Sundays at our house is an adventure. The man allowed me to sleep in a little this morning (7:30) until mlmm started screaming while the man was outside looking to kill him a squrriel. So up I went and the man and I watched a movie this morning and then it was time! Time for me and the kids to run and hide. I think that he is so funny! He wants me to stay home with him but he is so emotional when the Steelers play that we can not sit in the same room with him. It totally stresses me out! He yells, screams, jumps up and down, then he gets really mad! I think he thinks they can hear him!

Luckily we won and he was in a great mood for the rest of the day. While the man was watching football mod and I sat in my room with the little ones coming in and out. We watched a couple of movies and it was really nice to just veg out with her. I really love the girl she is becoming. It was so funny every time the little ones left my room she would look at me and say that's a bad idea! We even ate lunch in there to keep every one out of his way. While all this was happening mo played his play station and encouraged the man to yell louder. They can keep that crap to them selves. I find it funny that he yells so much at a game and then gets mad when mo does the same thing by yelling at a video game! He says its different but I do not see any difference! I am glad that he no longer stresses my mom out! Last year it really made her crazy when football was on. Last year at least he had my uncle and dad to hang out with so mom and I could go out and now I am stuck here.

After the Steelers played he made us hamburgers for Linner and then he even bathed the little ones for me. It was a change of choirs. I tried to get everyone to bed early so we can start school tomorrow without any fighting but, that didn't happen like I wanted. While watching my TV show tonight mod came in crying that her stomach was hurting. so after spending an hour with her it is time for me to finally finish this blog and get to bed I have a really Big day tomorrow! We are getting mod's school supplies and hopefully mo will have his classes up on the web!

I am praying that she doesn't wake up puking in an hour and that we have a great day tomorrow! Thank you God for allowing my husband to not die today from all the yelling and stress from a football game!

All I can say is WOW! (we won without the mercy rule 6-0) thanks to mo's recovery!

Got up this morning and tried to get as much cleaning done as possible before it was time to leave out the door to go to football. We only got half of it done and I think it was becwause I decided to stop and make breakfast. Seeing how we were going to be in the stands from 11-3! I thought it would be a good thing to eat big before we went. So we got out the door on time and we even got our shirts. So shirts on and all. Mod ran over to the cheer team and we went and got the little ones some candy to keep them quiet. Next week I am bring some stuff with us to keep them enterained. When it was time for mo's game they needed some one to work the chain gang and I volunteered the man. We have to volunteer 2 times so we can get back our 50 dollars that they have. So off he went and man was that a joke! ( the little ones wanted to go)

The first half I got to see and then that was it the little ones didn't want to sit with me anymore. Mlmm kept taking off to the snack bar to get more candy and then it happened I missed the play that caused us to win. I guess there was a fumble and mo jumped on it for a recovery on the 1 yard line. So we scored and I can not believe that I missed it. I am totally bummed and I am going to have to spend more money to get the DVD! All I can say is WOW! (we won with out the mercy rule 6-0) It even put the man in a great mood. Seeing how he was on the chain and mo wasn't playing very well in the first and then he came back and we won! I am so glad!

The rest of the evening was great the man made pork chops and I made rice and corn and mlmm was so excited she loves rice. She sang the Happy Birthday song all day today. She sings the monkey version. I think it is so funny. Mom got her house all finished and we didn't get to go over there and see it. I think that that is how our weekends are going to be from now on. Football and resting. I mean it is a long day when the kids have home games because mod needs to be there 1 hour before and the 1 hour after. So we are talking 4 hours in the sun! Kept the man up late tonight watch a stupid movie and every time he wanted to go to bed he would start talking ( he thought I would say go to bed, I didn't) I just kept pushing pause and the stupid movie took 30 minutes longer. Next time I think he is going to be quiet! HA! Well a very awesome day! Mo did great and made his dad happy, now if the Steelers can win tomorrow we will be doing great!

"I wanna sleep in your own bed!"

Well its official... I can no longer use the its because I have had baby that is why I am still fat. Things are a changing in our family starting today! My baby is three and I am no longer going to be FAT!

This morning the man gave mlmm her birthday boots and we sang to her before he left and I think that having her little party last week worked out great for her seeing how she got to celebrate it like 3 times. I even let her eat junk all day long. This is her favorite thing in the whole world! Eating chips, soda, and ice cream! She Loved it and I am so glad!

Well I got mo all ready to go on Monday! I also got to talk to his counselor and all I can say is no way not my kid! I mean I knew that he was smart but are you kidding me. Mo got a 100% on the GATE math test! So he will be in GATE for math and science. I knew that he was smart because he tested really high on the STAR test but who gets a 100%! So I am really happy that I am home schooling seeing how they are going to let him go at his own pace. The only problem the man has has to do with high school sports and we will see the kid in only in 5th grade.

After school I thought today would be a great day to switch beds and try to get the man back into my bed! I am not sure if it is going to work but hey! So I took the bunk beds out of the boys room and took them apart and put them into the girls room and then put the bunks that do not come apart into the boys room. I also went through mlmm's clothes and we are going to start looking on craigslist for some winter clothes. I am still believing that it is going to be a cold one this year!

We got the beds all moved and I got the rooms all cleaned out and then it was time for bed and I have never laughed so hard and the man and mlmm. She kept saying over and over "I wanna sleep in your own bed!" and he would say you want to sleep in your bed! He even laid in her bed and she wasn't having it. So she would get mad and then say it again "I wanna sleep in your own bed!" this went on for like 10 minutes until I couldn't stand it and then I laid next to her and she feel asleep. I hope she stays in bed that is my prayer tonight. Oh I also hope the man gets to sleep! He hates our bed! Well football tomorrow!

It wasn't me!

Well its day three and it started out for the most part not too bad! Mod is starting to get caught up. We can do most of the work online but we do have a lot to do when she gets her books next week. I still do not have mo all figured out and he just drove me about nuts this morning. All I kept thinking was you are crazy. There is no way you are going to be able to do this.

I made the kids all go out side and run around the property today for some added PE time and I think it was good. It gave me a moment to breathe. The thing that I think will be hard for me is that I no longer have a day off. I never did before but I don't even have 30 minutes to take a shower or even just a long time in the restroom pretending to use it so I can pray. I feel like there is always someone around me saying mom, mom, no mom, I need you mom! I also have realized that having the kids home means a lot more cleaning and cleaning! It is never ending!

Well tonight the man was out looking for the shot of his life time (squirrels) when he decided to fart! Mlmm as loud as can be shouted "It wasn't me!" this has been the highlight of my day! I totally love that line (its from Rocketman). The man came in and I thought he was going to bust his gut. I think that the more she is around me she is starting to become me. I love it she even has my faces. Mod was raised by babysitters and it is so obvious! So the rest of the evening whenever she heard anything out came the great line "It wasn't me!" way to funny!

Day 2 and I think it is getting worse!... "You better go outside if you are going to die!"

I can not believe how much I feel like I am a failure. I am doubting myself so much and I even yelled at the kids which I am very sad about. As I sit in bed and reflect about my day all I can say is wow. I woke up this morning and got a great email from a past friend encouraging me and I even got a little excited. Then I continued getting the kids already this morning. Mod is completely registered and she started by watching and participating in an online orientation and she even started on her classes it was so very encouraging. Then mo started in and that is when it went all down hill.. Why does she get to do that... why am I not registered...What about me...It's all about me...then he decided to get all the other kids all wound up and that was when I totally lost it. I can not believe how quickly he can just tick me off. I just want to SCREAM! Its totally a sucky thing because today is not the day to do this seeing how we had music and then I had a doctors apt. I just feel like I am making a BIG mistake! ( I even was told again to quit!)

I got the kids to practice and while they where in practice mod's teacher called and I really got a good feeling from her. She understood where I stood and even talked to mod. I just hope that this is really what I am supposed to be doing. We got finished with practice and then we drove through the drive thru and that was the first time today that mo was nice and sweet. Took the kids to moms and she helped mod finish schooling while I went to the doctors. It was totally frustrating because I just kept watching the clock tick by because they were running so far behind. I even told them that I was going to have to leave if I didn't get in soon. I have good news I am fatter than what I thought and I am still no closer to knowing why I can not sleep.

Got back to moms and I then rushed home to get the kids to practice. I just hope that tomorrow gets better. I also am praying that they get mo's stuff all figured out so he can start the schooling that he needs to. I got a phone call from the nurse about mo today and they are allowing me to follow my gut and get his blood work done so I just have to wait for the order to come in. I even found out the class mod was going to have at her old school and although I should see this as a sign I just feel confused and worried! Please pray for me!

On a funny note tonight the man and mlh were talking about his back and how his back is hurting and then I guess he said something like "Oh mlh I'm getting old." Then they talked a little more about why his back hurt and that it was because he was getting old then the conversation changed to mlh saying that the man was going to die because he was old and mlh said no dad you cant die and the man said i will die some day that is part of life then mlh said well "You better go outside if you are going to die!" When asking mlh about this he said "yeah dad is going to go outside to die because his bones will start to stink!"

Well I better go outside because I feel like I am going to die today! Oh also can you believe this weather Hello summer where did you go! Winter you need to wait until I get wood cut! We are going to freeze if you come this soon! I guess the man is going to have to cut wood this weekend I think it will be weird to have a fire this week if it keeps getting colder. Our high today was 60 and man is my house cold! The Uggs are coming out!

What was I thinking!

What was I thinking! I am totally crazy thinking that I could do this home school thing! I am totally not cut out for this I am a mom of four! Four wild and crazy kids and I want them to sit at a table and learn! Ha I can not do this! I am totally crazy and I think I need a reality check! I feel like quitting and it is only the first day! Help! I think I am insane! I know that even my friends that are teachers say that the first week is total craziness but this is just stupid!

I woke up to mo so excited and I thought hey I can do this and then I logged on to the school website and they do not have them registered so then I thought okay maybe I can still do this I called and they messed up and I guess my fax didn't come in a clear and they needed it to be. Then I thought I still have to have them do something and that was my big mistake. It also sucks that I do not think I have the support I need. I love my Sil but she is making this very hard and she keeps saying to me that I need to take the kids to real school. I think that I need a support group. I am not sure if I can do this but I am going to do it for a year! I am also not sure what I am supposed to do with the little ones when the kids are in school. I want to scream! Please tell me that I am not crazy!

For the most part my day was filled with negativity mo crying and starting fights, mlmm and mlh coloring and fighting and mod crying and whining and crying! HELP!

What kind of crapy holiday is this all about!

We got up early this morning to go to moms house and help. She called last night and the man cant say no! So off to moms we went taking the trailer so we could load up all the extra dirt. She has so much that the trailer tires were on the rims and the man was worried that we were going to break the trailer. But, thankfully we got home alright. mind you we only drove 30 miles an hour and it took us 55 minutes to get home (SIL followed us home in her car with the older kids). Totally long drive. I can not believe how tired I am and my house is not cleaned yet again. The sucky part was we had to unload that trailer all by our selves. Since my shoulder is still out I mostly watched today. But I did help when I was at moms and man I wanted a nap today and didn't get one!

I am not sure what kind of mean holiday this is calling it labor day! All it makes me think about is Labor and that is exactly what we did we worked our buts off. I mean really I think that my but is totally smaller. I think that this holiday is supposed to be for you not to Labor but that is not what happened today and I can not imagine how tired my mom must be (but hey her yard looks great!).

When we got home we called our neighbor and asked him if he wanted to come over ( his sister passed away and I thought this is the least I could do...feed him) So his son and him came over and we ate and watched Night at the Museum. I love that movie. They left and we got the kids to bed and after sitting up with Sil and wishing my shoulder would stop hurting I have decided to go to bed early I have school tomorrow. I just hope it goes okay. I am worried that I am in way over my head. I just hope I get a lot of sleep so I am not grouchy! Please pray for me!

We dared each other to put the bar of soap in our mouths.

We got to moms this morning and mom is completely fixing up her entire back yard again. She is getting ready for this big party she is having in two weeks! She is even getting new flooring and paint! So she is building a wall in her back yard and we will get to get some free dirt Yeah! My mom's hands look so bad blood and all! She made breakfast and it was so yummy! I think that mlmm is going to have the a couple of cakes! Mom is watching the kids for me on Wednesday so I can go to the doctors and she is getting her an ice cream cake! She is so excited!

Mom and mlmm where talking and she told her that she couldn't go swimming because the pool was stolen! It was so funny mlmm totally believed it and walked around looking for it then she went outside and came back in all excited and said "No! Its back" then mom told her that they must have returned it. So the kids went swimming and the man went to work getting the rest of his work done in the attic. He even cut open his head! While the man worked papa put on a movie for the kids and it is one of my favorite movies Rocketman! Its too funny to hear my little ones saying it wasn't me over and over! mom and I ran to Lowes while the man watched the kids and then we moved some furniture for moms carpet and flooring this week.

After we got done off we went again back home and I can not wait to have a nice and relaxing day tomorrow! Got home in time for the man to watch some football and for us to decided what to do with the last day so summer. I can not believe it is already here. Last day of summer.

While the kids were in the shower this evening I was in the bathroom and the boys got really quiet I mean even though I was in the room with them I could not hear them then I herd mod gagging and mo saying don't you puke! don't you puke! I dared you and you better not get me in trouble. So I heard mo laughing and then mod gagging and then crying and I opened the door to see mlh with a bar of soap and then mo said We dared each other to put the bar of soap in our mouths. This got me thinking about all the stupid things we do to our siblings. When I was younger my sister put soap in my eyes and I think I dared my brother to do some pretty stupid things a time or two. I just find it funny that they dared soap! Yuck!


So to my sister that put soap in my eyes thanks for the laugh tonight. It brought so much memories of our summers.

Here we go COLTS! Here we go!

Its football time I can feel it in the air! I can not believe that the kids were all ready to go and that we did all that we did this morning and got to the game on time! so, We got up this morning and I convince the kids and the man to get the house ready for the grandparents to come today! We have had such a busy day. Only the in-laws will be coming today but that is okay and I don't think mlmm really cares that much. So, we got the house cleaned and got to the game and I can not believe how hot it is today what the heck!

I am so glad that I sprayed the kids with sun screen and I am glad that I did. So while warming up we lost one of the kids to heat stroke before the game even started (we found out later that it was because of the antibiotics that he was on, Thankfully I didn't start mo on them last night). So there was only 11 kids today! Going both ways and not being able to rest really took its tole on mo. He didn't perform that well in the first half but then he showed up for the second. Too bad we lost...the other team had like 20+ kids which really helped them out they even had to do the mercy rule! Bad for them good for us. This team even had a second string! Way too crazy!

After the butt kicking we all went home and the man made hamburgers and then we sang mlmm's favorite song Happy Birthday! I think she was in heaven. My mother in law bought her the best present and they played and played. the in-laws left and we had a very quiet rest of the even. I can not believe how fast today went... I sprayed the kids and myself and I forgot my knees and man was that a big mistake they are so sunburned. I think that next Friday I will be sad since it is her real birthday! My baby is going to be 3! Tomorrow we are going to moms and then more football!

Yes I definitely think football is in the air!

Doctors apt for mo and praying for direction!

Today has been one of those days where I just feel like i am totally doing everything wrong. Woke up late and rushed mo to his appointment. He has had these swollen glands under his neck and when we went and got his physical the doctors insisted that we went to see the ENT that took out his tonsils in January. So here we are sitting in the office where I am forced to pay more money even though we have made our deductible this year and I feel like this has been the year of medical. I mean I am not sure how we are going to ever pay off all this money and we are already behind this month and I am not sure what we are going to do.

So we get into the doctors and he acts like I am a crazy mom. He gives mo some different antibiotics ( he took 2 weeks of antibiotics about a month ago and nothing happened) and sends us out the door and for us to come back in two weeks. I asked him what another round of antibiotics is going to do and I guess I wasn't thinking because I left out the door with out asking the important questions (it couldn't be because I had all four of them and they were all acting up). He said that if the antibiotics do not work then we would do blood work and go from there.

Then I went to moms and had to fax more papers in for mod and mo and then after talking to mom I think I really failed today as a mom. Then I got a phone call from the man and he continued to question my motherhood and how I forgot to ask questions like Why can't we do the blood work today and why take antibiotics if his blood work doesn't show an infection. Then the man asked me to call the doctors office and ask these questions and even though I got the antibiotics he didn't want me to give them to him until I asked some more questions. So I called and got nowhere. I also couldn't pick up the prescription because he forgot to call it in. So I left moms and went back to Walgreen's and then asked the pharmacists some questions and I guess I will just wait until the game is over tomorrow before I even decide what to do about the medicine.

Got home and since I still am feeling like a complete failure as a mom and now I am worried because everyone is telling me that his glans being so swollen could be something bad. I am just sad and wishing I could have handled today better. The big game is tomorrow and then we are having cake for mlmm. I do not think anyone is coming to the game or little party but, I am not so worried seeing how she is only three and the kids will have 7 more games after tomorrow. Well I am going to really have to pray for direction tonight.

Psalms 116:6 The LORD protects the simplehearted; when I was in great need, he saved me.

Today is Thursday and I typed my entire blog into word and then my computer crashed and it is gone. So I can not copy and paste like I do. So for today all I can say is I hate computers and I wish there was an easier way to fix this.

The kids went to practice tonight and we will not have uniforms for the cheerleaders in time for the game this week, Mod is totally bummed out. I also have to get up really early tomorrow and I am wishing that I could get to sleep. I am not going to retype my blog tonight because nothing that great happened today. Also I will give me room for this:


Psalm 116 (New International Version)

1 I love the LORD, for he heard my voice;
he heard my cry for mercy.

2 Because he turned his ear to me,
I will call on him as long as I live.

3 The cords of death entangled me,
the anguish of the grave came upon me;
I was overcome by trouble and sorrow.

4 Then I called on the name of the LORD :
"O LORD, save me!"

5 The LORD is gracious and righteous;
our God is full of compassion.

6 The LORD protects the simplehearted;
when I was in great need, he saved me.

7 Be at rest once more, O my soul,
for the LORD has been good to you.

8 For you, O LORD, have delivered my soul from death,
my eyes from tears,
my feet from stumbling,

9 that I may walk before the LORD
in the land of the living.

10 I believed; therefore I said,
"I am greatly afflicted."

11 And in my dismay I said,
"All men are liars."

12 How can I repay the LORD
for all his goodness to me?

13 I will lift up the cup of salvation
and call on the name of the LORD.

14 I will fulfill my vows to the LORD
in the presence of all his people.

15 Precious in the sight of the LORD
is the death of his saints.

16 O LORD, truly I am your servant;
I am your servant, the son of your maidservant;
you have freed me from my chains.

17 I will sacrifice a thank offering to you
and call on the name of the LORD.

18 I will fulfill my vows to the LORD
in the presence of all his people,

19 in the courts of the house of the LORD—
in your midst, O Jerusalem.
Praise the LORD.

Practice Practice Practice

Woke up this morning and wanted to put a bag over my head! I really need sleep and today is one of those days that just didn't go all that well. I feel like Wednesdays are no longer fun. I mean after yelling at the kids to get up and get ready so we can get out the door so we can get to practice is just not that fun! I even wanted the house picked up first which was just a bunch of yelling. Hopefully next week will be better. I also hate that the kids are so talented and yet they will not practice!

After going to practice and then fighting all the way home I just want today to be over. The only thing that was good today was the time I spent with mod and her indecisiveness about school. I really think that she would be great at it and I think it would really help her self esteem. I really want this decision to be up to the kids and I am not sure if that is what I should be doing. I just feel lost today!

It seemed like only a few minutes and then the kids where off again to practice. I can not wait until this weekend it is going to be the kids first game and I think that mo is going to do good. I also can not wait to see mod in her cheer uniform if they come in that is. Well as you can tell I am in a funk and today really shows. Maybe i will get some sleep tonight.

Mom I like your kisses better!

Mom called last night and this morning I woke up and got the kids out the door to go to mom's for Sunday breakfast on Tuesday! I love it and so did the kids. We got there just as she was finishing and it was great! After we ate I did the dishes and Uncle went shopping. After getting the kids school stuff all faxed over I sat and just hung out with mom. When she was done ( she had work to do) she asked me to play Wii with her and I am glad we did. We had a great time. I did realize that she loves to win and will not tell you all her secrets just to make sure she can still kick your but. I guess she played this game a lot and even beat it. It was so fun and I haven't laughed like that in a long time. Way too funny! Her house was like a refrigerator and I miss it. So here we were all bundled up in blankets and playing wii. I beat her once and then she pounced and killed me. H and her are so alike when it comes to this. We had a great time and I can't wait to play again.

After playing Wii I was all ready to go and then mlmm was taking her time and giving my mom all these kisses she really loves my mom. She was even telling my mom how she loved her more than me and my mom and her have this little secret it goes something like this...you can only keep my kisses you have to wipe off everyone's kisses but mine. So then mlmm told her that they are best friends and to not tell her mom even though I was sitting next to them. Then my mom told her she could keep my kisses too and then she said she didn't like my kisses. Not realizing the mlh was listening to all this he piped in and said "Mom I like your kisses better!" I now that my mom didn't like this but I LOVED it! I melted my heart! Since she has mlmm I will take all I can get from mlh! Because I know that they would chose here over me any day! "She has junk food and lets us eat in bed!" this is what mod tells me!

I slowly got the kids in the car and rushed home to get the kids to practice on time. If I had my way I would have stayed there all evening and night too! I love being with my mom and doing nothing it is great that the kids were good and let us play! The man came home and informed me that he thinks he is allergic to the sutures and that he is going to take them out even if are not ready seeing how they are dissolvable ones. I guess we will only see if he is and if the swelling goes down. I can not believe how crazy the last week and a half have been all because I said it was his turn! This is what he has told me the last two weeks. I can not wait until he is healed!

"Hey you're eating that, mom put oysters in there!"

I got up this morning and decided that today was going to be the day! I got the kids up and packed a bunch of fruit and some jam and even wrote a card. then we walked to the house and i sent mo over the fence and he knocked on the door. At first I thought this was a waste of time and then he knocked again and then she came to the door. I am so glad she did. We talked and we laughed and she even gave me the confidence I needed today. I talked to her about her choice in home schooling and signing the kids up for Awanas. She would even be mod's teacher. I didn't even think mod wanted to go until we got home. She is so excited to start school and wants to go next Wednesday. I can not believe how positive she is and how she really confirmed some things for me.

When we got back to the house mo and I decided to help the man out and weed eat the grass and pick up the front yard. I didn't think it was going to be a hard thing until I got out there and then I really had a stupid moment. The weed eater died and mo thought he could start it again but he flooded it. So we decided to get in the car and drag the property. We did that for a little while and then mlmm wanted out so we got out and ate lunch. The man came home shortly after we ate and he started the weed eater again for me and then he left for practice. When he was gone the weed eater died and i thought well he started it so easy it has to be a easy thing. Well I was totally wrong... I tried and tried and then called him and then tried and tried until pop out went my shoulder. I can not believe it... I am so sore and it hurts so bad. I will not be weed eating again for him. But at least the dragging I can do and I did it pretty well!


I made dinner tonight and when the man came home with the kids tonight mo rushed in and started in... that kid ate so much right before he was done the man came in and said hey you're eating that...mom put oysters in there! I thought he was going to puke up his entire dinner. He stopped eating put his food up and went and got into the shower. Poor boy I really think he is going to be a target for a while. I even explained that I didn't put that in the food but he wasn't even going to try to finish eating it.

While sitting here and typing this out I have decided that the next thing that has to happen in my life is I need to find a church not just keep trying new ones. All though I have decided that I could be a great church consultant (someone who goes to different churches and tells them where they can improve). I do feel like this is my calling because I have been every where and I have tried good churches and great churches big sucky churches and small good churches that are dieing. I really need to just jump in and get involved some where. Right now I feel like I am the person that is wadding in to the pool with 100 kids trying not to get my hair wet. With every step in it keeps getting harder and harder. I think I need to stop wadding get out and just jump in. When its hot outside and when there are all those kids once you do you feel so much better.

Things I learned today...my neighbor has a better garden than I...I think I can do this home school thing...and I have decided to become a church consultant! Anyone looking to fix their church? You should hire me!

Smoked Oysters, Anchovies and lots of puking!!!

Woke up with a hang over headache with out drinking a thing. I think it was because of the long day in the sun with little water and the long drive there and back. I also think it has to do with the lack of sleep do to getting up to drink a ton of water and then getting up to the restroom! Yeah! Thankfully the man helped me out by watching the kids while I slept in until 8:30. I am so glad that I have a great man. Mom called and asked us to come over but due to the headache and the mans swollen parts we stayed home and watched TV and hang out with the kids.

I can not believe how cold it is it feels like a cold winter is coming and we haven't even started to cut wood. I think we are going to be in trouble with having to buy propane and with fires and wood. I guess we will only see how cold and how much snow we get. It definitely feels like football season already. Between the cold and now games on Saturday I am sure I will be hating football by the time the Superbowl comes around. I can not get over the fact that today's high was only 69.

The man decided to go to the market and get some brauts for him and the kids because of the Steeler game this evening and too the little kids with him. When they returned the came with some gifts. He bought the kids some ice cream and the brauts and then he with a grim showed me what he got in the bag and then said well if they can eat fish eyes then they can try these. So off to the kitchen he went and called the kids in and I wish we had a video camera because man oh man. First he showed them what he got then he started in and i thought i was going to puke just by the smell. I mean YUCK! He had smoked oysters and anchovies. My brave daughter went first and she is defiantly her dads kid. Mod ate both and continued to eat. Mo got suckered into it and put a small bite of the oysters in and then ran to the sliding door to puke outside. At this time mlh can already put in a mouth full and seeing mo puke made him run and he started puking. At this time I am sitting on the couch laughing so hard. I can not even breath. Then everything calms down so I thought when mo runs into the kitchen and starts puking again. He is totally pissed off at this time because i am laughing so hard at him. Then he tells us what happened and why he is puking. I sent him to the bathroom to take a shower. While in the shower he started yelling for the man ( I guess he needed his tooth brush and tooth paste). I must tell you that the reason why he started puking again was because he snorted in and i guess a piece of the oyster he threw up earlier ended up in his mouth and that was all it took. While all this was going on mlmm came in and said YUCK you guys smell and left the kitchen. way too smart. So lesson for the day mo doesn't like canned oysters and mlh will puke when seeing someone puke and I was smart for sitting in the living room and laughing.

After a lazy day I am sitting in bed and I am so full of doubt and I just wish I could have someone tell me what to do. I know that I really should home school the kids but I am not sure if that is the thing i should do. i also am not sure if I can do it. i love mo but, I just do not know if i can do this. I wish I had a direct line to a decision maker that gave me all the answers. Maybe I should get an eight ball. Ha! that would be so funny. I think the kids would freak! they would think I was crazy! I could just see it know eight ball should we go out today?

Well I guess tomorrow i am going to meet the neighbor. I am going to finally do it wish me luck!

Look mom its snowing outside!

I woke up this morning with out a sign of the man being off all week he needed to get somethings done this morning. He was out the door before I even saw a light on. This never happens I always see him before he leaves. When I finally got up I heard mlh and mlmm looking out the sliding glass door with that look of excitement on their faces and then mlh starting screaming "Look mom its snowing outside!" I haven't seen them so excited in a long time. Then I walked over to the slider and saw the fog and man it did look like it was about to snow. I think that the kids really like the winter up here. Unfortunately it was just fog and mist and a nice 40 degrees outside. I do find this weird because it is supposed to be the hottest month in the year and it looks like winter outside.

Got the rest of the kids up and we picked up the house and got everyone ready to head out the door to go to Ventura for some football. I think because my growing up years did not include sports i think this whole football thing is totally crazy! So for the rest of the year it will be football on Saturday in the heat and then football on Sunday! Marring a sports man has its up and downs and I am not sure where I stand. Got a call from the man saying that he would be able to go with us so out the door we went and I decided to pack lunches which was a total smart thing! ( I even feed another mom's kids who did not know it was a all day thing!)

We got to Ventura and because our team is completely unorganized we were the first ones there and looked like fools waiting for everyone else to show up late. they gave mo the wrong size pants and thankfully another mom called the coach and complained so the team mom brought him the right size ( and her kid the right size). So off went the small ( so small I couldn't even get them over his pads and laced up) and on went the new I thought he was going to freak out changing in front of everyone. If only he knew how many times mod has had to do that. So three 40 minute games later and I am a tired, tired mom. for the most part the little ones did okay. Mod kept them entertained and thankfully there were other kids. Mlmm played dead and laid all over the stands and I just kept thinking this is going to be a long season. I think next weekend will be better, a real game and cheerleaders! At least I hope so anyways!

When we got in the car I realized that I completely failed as a mom today poor mlmm is so sunburned and man does her little noise look bad. The drive home was great all the kids rested and mlmm and mlh slept the man put some ice on and I cranked the radio to keep me awake. I defiantly need to get a team shirt so I can fit in with all the other moms. I was the only one with out one. I will have to succumb to this kind of peer pressure I guess. Ha! When we got home my little ones decided to put on a cheer performance and I think that mlh singing R-O-W A DY! is going to get really old even if it is totally cute (mlmm says C- colts! and throws her arms on a high V) I really need a video camera!

So we got home after stopping off to get some trees from a craigslist posting. I got over 20 yearlings for $45. I cannot believe it I hope they all survive the winter. I can not wait to plant them next weekend. When we got home because of being so tired I just wanted the kids to all go to sleep. I really need sleep, not sure if its because of being sunburned or the lack of water today but I am drained! Hopefully a great day tomorrow!

The world is a much happier place when you figure out if you are the pin or the cushion...

The man is still not up to par and now has a new something going on down there. I can not believe this is happening. Really can not believe it. What bad luck! I attempted to clean the house and it is not going like I planed. But that seems to be the status around here. Maybe I need to stop planning. So for the day all I can say is...The world is a much happier place when you figure out if you are the pin or the cushion....I think this sums it up for me today! I know that we all have choices but I think some people really are the pin and some are the cushion and I wish to not be either. I can not even talk about my day because I am having one of those UGGGGH days and maybe tomorrow will be better. Football in beautiful Ventura! I can not wait!

Hanging out with the my sleeping man.

I can't even talk about my day today because I feel so selfish I feel like just saying a couple of words like I am sorry. Sorry I talked you into having this done. I really am! I hope you get to go back to work soon. No you will not always look like that. It's not that bad! I will get you ice, just sleep, just give it time. I am sorry your work doesn't understand. I love you! I think this is how most of my sentences went today.

For the majority of the day we hung out and watched the man sleep. The kids kept to there selves and I am glad they did. I knew that yesterday was to good to be true. He for the most part has been a grouchy bear and is totally mad that he is still laying around and wants to be at work. He is very uncomfortable and I really do feel sorry for him. I know that after this weekend it is going to be all good. I just know it.

I took the kids to practice and made dinner and the whole day was all about the man! Please continue to pray for him!

Surgery and an audition!

Woke up at the crack of dawn so we could get out the door. Uncle showed up and got the kids to take them to my moms house. I am glad he did I am not sure if we would have made it on time seeing how we needed to drive to Encino in 7 am traffic. ( I do wish mom would have come though mlh wasn't having any part of it and didn't want to go, if mom would have come he would have been in that car with out a tear). Mod went with us and I am glad she did. She kept me company and she really knows how to keep the man smiling. I think that she is becoming a pro. I am so proud! Well we got there right on time and seeing how none of us ate I thought we would have been able to get some food but I was wrong. Good thing I brought some crackers. So I bought mod a soda and I got a coffee in a can and we ate wheat thins and waited by the surgery exit and ate. It was fun to see everyone leaving all drugged up.

They were changing out a suit in the building and they had put down plastic wrap on the floor and mod walked up and down the hallway. It was like her very own bubble wrap hallway. She would walk slow and then fast and then do the running man in place. I just sat and laughed and laughed. In between all this we practiced her lines. The doctor was late and that is when i thought he better slow down and not rush this. I almost tripped him he was running into the surgery suit so fast. Before I knew it the doctor was out and let me know the same thing ice...ice...ice!

The man came out about an hour later and gave me this get in the car look. So I went and got the car mod went and got him some juice and off we were. After exiting the parking lot I asked him what was that all about and then he proceeded to tell me he was completely messed up and he just wanted out of there. ( the last time he had surgery he couldn't wake up and it took him like 6 hours to wake up, this time the doctor listened to him and he lightly sedated him. He also told me that while the were waiting for the doctor to arrive the nurse asked him if we took pictures. I think this was a weird thing to say, but we did take pictures just in case something else went wrong and they will be deleted as soon as he heals. Or as soon as he scares all his friends from ever having this done!


Mod did okay at the audition (I love it when she auditions for film they are always on time and oh so wonderful) I think they wanted younger but she did have the right look! I really wish she would have nailed it but oh well. Maybe with some new pictures things will get better. On the way home we stopped off and went to lunch. i really love Mexican food and so does the man. My little white girl wanted french fries that she didn't eat because she ended up eating part of my food. I swear she is so blond sometimes. When we got home Uncle brought the kids home and I took the kids to practice made dinner and then picked them up again and I really wish he felt better I do love how he takes them to all there practices. I can not believe how well he is doing tonight. I guess we will see tomorrow.

On a funny note I guess I could keep the pictures and use them for blackmail! HA

Well the doctor messed up and its surgery this time!...." and for daddy's nuts!"

Woke up this morning and got the kids ready to take the man to the doctors this morning. I left mlh and mod with sil and we took mlmm and mo with us to the doctors. At first it was ok and the kids were doing good and then mlmm was stick of this place and wanted to go. I am not sure if it was because of all the older people that came in or the one in the wheel chair that kept smiling without teeth that freaked her out but she was done. So I took the kids into the hallway while the man was in with the doctor and I had this feeling that something was wrong and I was right. He came out and man I haven't seen him so mad as I did today. I think if he was on the munsters I could have seen the steam come out of his ears. He looked at me and said I have to get blood work done and I am having surgery in the morning the doctor messed up!

I took the kids out to the car and we drove around the building to keep mlmm quiet. Well i tried to keep her quiet she cried and cried for her daddy. I thought like calling the man and having him come and get her but he was already pissed off so I kept driving around in circles. After a couple of minutes I called him and i should have just kept driving around man his is totally mad at this doctor. He got in the car and explained to me that he showed the doctor and he said some choice words and then told him that he could just wait a couple of months and it cold fix itself. But, after telling the doctor how he feels and how he has to work for a living he quickly changed his mind and surgery it is. I am not a man but all I know is I guess it fells like someone is kicking him over and over. Which is making him sick to his stomach and there is now way he can work like that.

We got home and the man sat in the chair and ice, ice, ice. After about 20 minutes of that I decided to go shopping with Sil. I took the list and we went without the kids. we first stopped off at Verizon Sil is totally sick of my phone and I am so glad she was with me because I am getting a "like new" phone. do not get me wrong we were there almost 30 minutes before they even listened to me. then Ben (that is his name) decided to do a hard reset and guess what it didn't fix it. SHOCKING! My phone fried another SD card. He then gave me a number and told me to get in my car and call the number and get a "like new" phone. that is exactly what I did and i should be getting it in a couple of days. Yeah! I will have internet again. I will have phone calls and a phone that rings! I am so excited!

We got to Walmart and I can not believe it what a mess they are remodeling and it was so hot and I thought I was going to be sick. i couldn't even focus on what we were to get. We we got home I realized that I forgot the one thing he asked for and all I could think of was you got to be kidding me. I forgot the brauts. The brauts that I do not eat. Please kill me already. ( I already feel bad for the guy) At least I got the beer!!! I mean I hate to shop as it is. I hate spending all that money on food that just makes me fatter and fatter. I know I am the one eating it but I still hate buying it and wasting all that money. Anyone want to shop for me maybe you will do better than me!

I think that this heat is making me a mean and not caring person. Spent 30 minutes trying to get the green out of mod's hair so she can audition tomorrow. I hope that she does good. I think she has lost her glow and maybe needs to get back into classes. I just wish we had the money. The man keeps saying he wants to pull her but, I can't disappoint her like that. Plus I know she loves it. I know she needs a couple of good auditions to get her back into the game.

Stayed up late and did Sil's nails and then I sat up and watched time on my clock. Here I am up late worried about tomorrow and praying for an easy fix. I guess I feel bad for giving him so much crap this weekend and for calling him a baby and look at what happened. Well off to watch the clock some more. Please pray for the man. mlh and mlmm prayed tonight way to funny. they pray for everyone I mean everyone... they both prayed for everyone like this mom, mlmm, mod, and mom, mo, sil, warranty, ethanol, H, super chef, mlmm, mom, Nana, uncle, papa, mom, mlmm, then I chimed in don't forget daddy and then mlh said and for daddy's nuts! This prayer repeated itself only this time it was for mlh, mom, and mom, and mom, mlh! I guess my little ones think I need the most prayer because they say my name 10 more times than everyone else. Well I guess I will be saying mlh's prayer tonight... "and for daddy's nuts!"

101 degrees outside and we went to the zoo...How stupid am I?

Got up this morning and I felt like a kid going to Disneyland for the first time. I love making my kids guess where we are going. After about 10 minutes of mlh and mo guessing mlmm come in and said "HELLO we are going to see elephants!!!" then mo said "HA I was right!" which he was not right. I do not think he even thought about that. Made lunches and explained to the kids that there father was home and if they made me mad they could stay home and bring him ice. Since no one thought that was a fun thing off we went and I thought the excitement was going to kill them. I know that mo can get under anyone's skin but, man was he on a mission this morning. I have learned to ignore him and then he stops but that is not so easy for other people I have found out. I thought SIL was going to ask to go home only after 5 minutes in the car. Got gas and then got Starbucks. I can not believe it I got to drink it all by myself. Yeah!

When we got to the zoo between the bees and the sign on the window I should have said lets go to the aquarium. But, I guess I am stupid! Due to the extreme heat some animals will be harder to see that others. EXTREME heat! OH MY they were not joking! I bought the tickets anyway and then decided that I didn't want to hear a thing from ANYONE! We were going to have a great time no matter how hot it was!! I now looking back on it totally acted like my mom on a mission. I am laughing now but I still do not think anyone else is. I mean I looked at that map and figured out where we needed to go and how fast we needed to go and didn't care who got left behind I wanted to see as much as possible before the heat got to bad. I think SIL was going to either kill me or the kids. Sitting here writing this I realized that maybe we should have just slowed down and took our time but...i guess from all the rushing around with my mom I realized this was the best way to see everything and to make sure you get my money worth.

HA HA I am totally cracking myself up right now. I mean you should have seen me I bet I looked like the crazy mom with four kids and a sister in law who wanted to die. I realized through this little experiment... SIL and mo get grouchy when they get hot and hungry and I go faster when people complain. I can not believe it! I totally rushed us out of there in 6 hours and saw everything. I also decided that I was going to be my dad and not pay for tram tickets so we walked the entire zoo!!! Oh did I forget to mention it was 101 outside! I even sprayed water on the cry babies when they complained. Next time we will not go in a heat wave and we will pay to ride the tram!

When I got home the man gave me the something is wrong look and then said we need to go to the doctors tomorrow I think something is wrong. So my day has just gone from hot to hotter. Got mo to practice and when I got home I made dinner and then went back to pick him up. Sil bathed the kids and I am thankful for her even though I totally stressed her out today. I will say with all my craziness we saw a lot and ate sandwiches and grapes in the car on the way home and only spent money on the tickets and I think we got what we paid for. I know that it was totally worth it! 101 and all, I even got to use mussels I haven't used in years. It was like going to the gym with 4 kids. Pushing that stroller up and down all those roads. Yep! I guess this is one time when acting like a mom on a mission is a good thing!

Please pray for my man! I think something is really wrong and I am worried!

"Please stop making me laugh you really are hurting me!"

Woke up this morning to the man explaining to me that I owe him and its all my fault. Unfortunately it is not my day. So it can not be my fault. I do feel bad for him! HA HA (not really, I mean really I have had for kids he can be sore for a couple of days). So he has been the worst patient he didn't want to take his medicine then complained about it and now informed me that he believes that he might have had an allergic reaction to the medicine that he is on. Why is this my fault? So here I am sitting here with the man saying ice...ice...ice. that was enough for me. I do love him and I am glad that he did this but come on really. I just hope he takes it easy so that I don't have to hear about it for ever.

Hung out with the kids this evening and waited for Sil to get here. The entire day the man kept saying the same thing to me which got me thinking. I am funny! I am so funny and he never noticed because he never listens to me and never has to just sit. All day he kept saying "Please stop making me laugh you really are hurting me!" I do not think he has laughed that hard in a long time. Or as Sil said maybe its because of the drugs he is on. What ever the case I am going to continue to say it is because of me. I am FUNNY! Didn't really hang out that much this evening due to the fact that we are going to the zoo tomorrow and because I am tired. The man woke me up so many times last night maybe he will sleep more tonight and I will not have to get up to get ice...ice...ice!